I remember when I was 19 working at Popeye’s Famous Fried Chicken. I would take the trash to the dumpster which was almost directly in front of the drive thru menu board. The dumpster was only chest high so I would throw the trash can up giving it a quick pull back while I rested the trash can on its side. The trash bag would release and I would pull the can down. One night after sundown, when there were no cars in the drive thru, I took the trash out. I threw the can up as always but when I tried to bring it back, the bag carried the can towards the inside of the container. My instincts made me jump a short jump resting my stomach briefly on top of the dumpster, but since my hand wouldn’t let go of the can, I was pulled into the dumpster.
There I was sitting inside the dumpster and then I seen it. Lights from a car that was ordering at the drive thru. I didn’t dare get out figuring those people would see me. I waited almost 10 minutes for different cars to go thru and finally got out of there, a touch embarrassed by it all. I walked into the store and went back to work thinking I would share that story another day. Then my manager came to the kitchen and asked me: “Are you alright? A couple cars said they seen someone fall into the dumpster and then they didn’t see you get out”. Ugh!
I remember sitting in the dumpster thinking how did that happen? Why didn’t I let go? If I tell people what happened, will they remember and tell others? I really did feel dumb. Ever stay in a relationship too long? Keep a friend longer then they deserved to be your friend (forgiveness is one thing but abuse is not acceptable)? Hang out with a crowd that after a while develops drama? Go after a potential significant other when you knew they were just a bad news? Way too many of these type questions show up in our lives simply because they exist. Bad people, bad relationships and bad situations. Everyday we are faced with decisions of who and what should influence our lives. With Thanksgiving upon us, we all think of the many things we are grateful for. Then Christmas hits and we are in a giving mood. Then New Years and of course the resolutions for a “new year and a new me”. All of these are great intentions with the potential for good things to happen.
But I can’t help but notice how many of us (I am guilty too), go thru the motions over the next 40-60 days and then wake up later in 2013 thinking how did I get here? Why did I hang onto to the trash that clutters my life? You know what happens when you keep trash around you all day long? It stinks, everyone notices and people talk. We may think that our “dark moments” are not seen, but trust me, someone sees everything we do. How many times do we make that effort to do better, get better and live better while still clinging to things we shouldn’t be clinging to that weigh us down or hold us back? I myself have had a reluctance to writing over the years and only recently forced myself to write. For me, its not getting rid of something physically, its getting rid of the “mess” that builds up inside of me and in an odd way it keeps me from expressing myself, therefore leaving my mind cluttered with thoughts and ideas to remember. Makes it hard for me to focus and give people my best efforts. Any goals of “New me, New Year” are suddenly slowed down. I would compare it to trying to run a race with a 50 pound backpack strapped across your back.
So what types of things are you needing to trash and get out of your life? Do you really want to carry them into the 2013? What types of people do we need to surround ourselves with that will encourage, nurture, motivate and love us enough to help us remove that clutter whether it be a boyfriend or girlfriend who doesn’t deserve us to those friends who repeatedly take us thru drama? One year from now, will you be wondering, how did I get here? Okay, off my soapbox. . .